Robert: There’s this Miko/Aqua cosplayer I follow on TikTok that was streaming today. I’m gonna try to get her to cosplay pregnant Towa. Benton: Abraham Lincoln, moments before his assassination.

Staying home from work today and already bored out of my mind, forgot that the only thing on daytime internet is Skibidi Toilet and Nijisanji EN

It *is* kind of the pedophiles anthem

I just love the idea of a very stereotypical Louisiana politician explaining the world to me.

You see, when I hired these Antebellum prostitutes…

The Freemasons are taking all the bingo tables

A morning cigar? You gotta be Fidel fucking Castro.

I will not give Michael a DIME if I do not catch a fish.

Zach: I remember that one time I went to Sonic with Robert and broke his camera lens. Benton: Is that a euphemism for sex or something?

Oh... shitto... white boy developer-san, he pedophile, need make friend with him.

Never click a touhou profile pic on youtube. You will be DISGUSTED by what you see on that account.

I'm pretty sure a feature of most vtubers is that they also function as a Panasonic dishwasher

Robert: Corporate chuubas were a mistake Benton: Its either the corporate payroll or a psyche ward we both know that

Robert: Kanauru is getting a lot better at creating a unified vision for his MVs and not having it just be a giant puddle of memes. Also: \textit{shion tummy}. Benton: \subtitle{Christmas List} \begin{itemize} \item towa tummy \end{itemize}

Robert: Can’t wait for the monochrome Fumo to reach the yahoo auctions Benton: "No mother, I instructed you to produce the Lagtrain Fumo by Christmas day. You know that now I have no choice but to shit in dishwasher while you slumber. I'm really just doing what needs to be done now that you've made your choice"

You gotta have the rubidium time card with RGB.

You better be voting slap on that goddamn deer pokemon

Fauna it would be... it would be really funny if you took off your shoes and showed us your feet... right?

Benton: Do you think the Japanese know Gawr Gura? Robert: Of course, she's only the most subscribed vtuber of all time. Benton: Yeah, but like the general anime community in Japan? Robert: One in five Japanese women are probably vtubers. They know her.

I still randomly think back to riding around in William's car as we play that demented children's music in the boondocks of Kentucky looking for a campsite.

I really don't like this bank vault I'm in, I’d rather be a cashier working at a Pokeworks.

Because you have to be an actual schizoid to use functional programming.

What in gods name does this have to with fumos?

Benton: Vtuber Lore be like: "Zephyrhills Reimu-Johnson is a cute and funny former resident of the planet Little Saint Jupiter. But whhaAatT!??!? She's over 2.34e12 years old! After searching the cosmos for the worst fans imaginable, she took the body of an 11 year old nekomimi and loves the color purple! Now she has to stream every 48 hours so that the Morbites she has within her soul do not consume her from the inside out. She loves to sing and her dream is to perform at the Tokyo Dome one day. Birthday 7/11" Robert: Vtuber lore be like: “Gawroobius Gooch is a spunky, corn-fed member of Niggasanji Orlando. When she isn’t volunteering at a local Lyger victim therapy group, she can be found overseeing the Hideyoshi gender affirmation station. Her favorite food is the Travis Scott burger (halal) and favorite color is imposter red. Her body was meticulously designed by a mentally ill Japanese woman banned from public parks and playgrounds. An Australian man was arrested in Bunnings’s lumber section for wearing her birthday celebration 2022 merchandise. Her dream is to go to Brazil. Please buy her latest album from your local redbox.”

Benton: At this point can we replace Stacys with Menhera? Robert: SACS’s Macie Pasini can’t compete with North Shinjuku Catholic’s Laplus Darkness

Menhera > Jimmy Kimmeru

Lee: who is Emma Brown Robert: A fertile goddess Benton: no please Michael: the love of my life Jade: a goddess Rachel: pungent and fertile Lee: rachel i miss u. i wish i could talk to my bestie aka u Rachel: im sorry bb im gambling rn

Robert: amesame fortnite 😳 Benton: 1220s young men: "Aye, harvest will be plentiful this year after months of the work we put in son, let finish the stonework on the chimney lest we grow too cold". 2020s young men: "amesame fortnite 😳"

Robert: "She also holds a certification as middle school art teacher." Can you imagine if your middle school art teacher was Nakiri Ayame? Benton: My middle school art teacher was Black, you can't tell me she was Ayame.

Robert: Must acquire art hoes Rick: I miss the good old days when you'd talk about school shooter natalie portman. Benton: Why is it so hard to find Fumocore Redneck Tomboys who will love me, I'm not asking for much in this world

It’s only a few more years before everyone’s required to bring a Fumo to work

Ryan needs to stop hanging out with Ryan’s brother, I think he’s a bad influence on Ryan

Hearing an Indian man moan oniichan… that’s going on the bucket list

Benton: Disney be like "Tatami Galaxy 2: Akashi graduates and moves from Japan to Williamsburg NY to open a feminist improv bar and discover her sexuality, while she's got some lessons to learn from her friend Lydia, a body positive obese refugee from Afganistan. A slice of life classic Japanese story coming June 2022" The first episode is just them getting the vaccine and purchasing a new iMac with Kamala Harris. Michael: GET THE JAB, SHINJI

Benton: Why are chicks so into serial rapists? Robert: You know.

When the hottest chick in your CS class is [redacted]... It really isn't great to see that...

You know when you have a binary that's dropping cores and you're trying to get the one with the stack trace that looks different from the others and is actually helpful. They should make a gacha around that feeling

When mom finds the Same x Ame Chonker Femboy Dom fanart i favorited on my pixiv account (I didn't get her permission)

Benton: Top video: Irys. Why? Robert: just look at the miko thumbnail and be healed. some eyebleach for you. Benton: Damn. That's a nice miko.

I want a Pikamee President

I like how you can't tell the guys apart from the girls ... thank God for Indonesia

This is like Asacoco IRL

Robert: The hololive girls must be Japan's first female comedians Benton: Japan's? They're the first female comedians ever!

The Jews have been real quiet since Flare's new outfit dropped.

I think I'm hag-pilled now

You could probably squeeze her waist and her pancreas would come out her asshole

Jesus Christ, the fucking globes on her chest

Aqua *does* look like the trans flag...

I will give you $1000 if you can make this person kill themselves

Benton: How long have you been waiting for this? Robert: 5 years.

Big Vtube uses Hebrew like lettering, proof that only one man holds the world's supply of vtube talent: Yajew. Wake up sheeple.

That was like Seitokai no Ichizon levels of making use of the available set

The soap is black. The soap is black. The soap is black.

Benton: Royale High makes more money than adopt me... Matt: That's not possible. Adopt me has more peak players than cs:go, and has partnerships with Warner Brothers.

I can’t believe they made a show out of a minecraft mod, this is crazy

Why does the jew router block polkas?

OOO, MILKIES *camera rotates 90°* Oh. They really made some promises they didn’t intend to keep with that initial image.

Everyone in Arkansas is a chubby milky mommy

Is this a super zoom in on her breast? Did she get a boob job?

Benton: Alright, pause— lore time. Robert: one sec. Robert: *waits for camera to pan to anime breasts* Robert: *pauses* Robert: alright, what?

That’s a rare Hideyoshi

I bet you’re allowed to bring STAX to school.

Robert: Is this supposed to be someone? Benton: Looks like a whore.

I just deployed the Rust version… 50mbps down to zero.

Wikipedia: Arthur Goldwag, author of a book on conspiracies and secret societies, characterizes Asahara as one who "saw dark conspiracies everywhere promulgated by Jews, Freemasons, the Dutch, the British royal family, and rival Japanese religions". Benton: >Burns down a Haagendaaz

Is this like Skrillex as a grandpa?

Are you trying to get frozen things sent to us? The store is less than a mile away!

Dude! Tummy party!

Why is Squanto on a manga cover?

Foot on da tiddie

my dream last night included fucking jeans

The only thing I coom for is A-chan's jeans. When's the Levi's sponsorship? They have famous Levi jeans at the museum in San Francisco. I just want them to have the virtual jeans.

Benton: Why are these people making A-chan fan art, it's a waste of time Robert: No. Benton: Did you say "no"? Robert: dem JEANS doe

Benton: I think I liked shion in the beginning. Imagine that Robert: I like Shion Benton: I wasn't saying she was bad it's more like she's just what I imagine liking nowadays Robert: Jewish tummy, y'know? Benton: Ok yeah she is pretty tummypilled. Ok though Towa vs Shion: who is more tummypilled? Robert: Shion, ez Benton: Towa Tummy > shion midsection Robert: *vomit emoji* Benton: (((Shion))) Apologists: "I love watching shion be smug I hope she likes her black boyfriend". Towa Epic Cool People: "Wow I love how many cute noises she makes, her tummy is of high quality" Robert: Towalets (read: toilets): omg I can’t wait to watch my favorite russian oktavist do another binaural corn asmr video. I’m going to listen to those corn husks crinkle imagining they’re her armpit hair. Benton: Shion: more like pee on Robert: *god I wish that were me.jpg* Benton: yeah I shoulda seen that coming

move over womb posters, time for pit posting

tummypilled

Womb simps are a powerful race

Damn, she even got a little bit of pit

She's the resident milf for Hololive

In the end, all that will be left is Bald Shion, the future child of Jeff Bezos and the worlds first artificial megumin, and the masses will beg for death, but only the grateful few will it be awarded to.

She definitely has a hue change on her right tit

The only one whose status I care about is trap Chika

Theres just a regex asic running in the AT&T routing centers that checks for Flandere and automatically ignores the incoming traffic

I wish there was something like the Rust docs for Japanese

Im gonna remember this time for the wild west that was the early days of hololive. One day when Yagoo is the sole owner the Disney Empire, Fubuki has her own console, and Asacoco is the worlds first virtual US senator for Georgia, I'm gonna tell my kids what it was like to watch sakura miko sing along with Watame and not even make sense to her own Japanese viewers. *sips peach tea* Yepppp, those were the days. And they will know why, instead of mowing, we all let our grass grow tall.

I love grilled cheese… scatman…

Every time I see someone pull out vim and use it well… it makes you think… Are you a trap? You can’t be that autistic to use vim and not have anything else going on in life.

Robert: I wonder who has more trannies— computer science or english? Benton: Computer science. But the real question is: who was more traps? The answer is none of them. I haven’t seen any traps… that I know of. Astolfos lurk in the shadows.

I did some calculations on a process I wrote up for generating the lavender. If we generate the lavender on what i am calling the "Niter Feed Slagloop" process we should, given a stack of wood blocks and a stack of sandstone, generate 2377.14 lavender flowers on average with a standard deviation of 293.00. I have no estimate for the power this requires.

I hope Chroloqualines work for Hololive addiction because I am a sick man

When you were watching anime chungus, I was listening to PPTenshi's Souran 80 times in a row... When Aqua was screaming for 2 hours straight, I was watching Watame disconnect 4 times in 2 minutes... When you were simping for Matsuri, I was cheering for Coco's RTA record... Now, in your time of need, you come to me for the 4th gen meta?

Benton: Imagine buying a my hero academia cosplay just to film yourself on tik tok. It's less shameful to post a full frontal at that point.

I wish my hair was long enough so I could shove carrots in it.

These aren’t your typical boomers, these are your "I took 7th grade math and don’t need to take shit from you" boomers.

In this episode of GJ Club…

William: I just got terrible news Benton: The last tomboy has died William: No, there is a recall on passenger airbags for the Hybrid Tahoe

Corona virus is only distracting us from the real issues at steak [sic] There is a national pandemic of simps and a tomboy shortage

Get you a bitch with chicken scissors

Robert: Nvidia’s GPU Technology conference is now online Benton: Buncha queers

Momo's just another jahfish in the sea.

Benton [Arkansas] is bayou, bayou is not wholesome chungus. Bayou is KKK land.

Robert: They were talking about that at the anarchist roundtable last night. Benton: They were talking about RAILS?! Robert: No, removing your penis. Benton: Oh, okay.

Oh you KNOW I’m boutta download creature.

Ryan: [redacted] [redacted] [redacted] boobs removed. They are completely gone. Benton: This is information I was not expecting nor will I be able to formulate a response

Ryan: You can't make this up. We are in the end times. Robert: Make a chastity belt for plus size androgynous traps that unlocks according to smart contracts written on the consensual blockchain. Benton: Pitch a systems coding language for Moephillic teens who desire a bootstrapped JIT cuckpiler for ease of development aimed at designing a Websocket API for questions about their virtual partners sexuality and asking for consent.

13% of virtual functions contribute to 52% of the code runtime

Press the play button I wanna see her die.

Imagine if Avengers had an intro

Bruh we should run Mikan on firefox 😳

We’ve had a red alert and a bruh alert in the same day.

I dedicate this binary to tangerines everywhere

It is the dirty corner whore of programming languages.

Damn I wish yuri was real

Benton: Dude wtf no one told me the sequel was already out!!!! Robert: I hear the series went to shit after Treyarch bought them out Benton: Yeah i used to love the spinoff but once they added multiplayer to the first person rts section it got a little lame Robert: They took out Tank Dempsey from the lineup, and the nerfed Wunderlove just doesn't pack the same punch it used to. Benton: Yeah the Love-Love gun teir 3 ruined the dialogue choices. Hey but at least they got the speedrun down to 72:34:11 Robert: Yeah, can't believe Syndicate called AliA the n-word after his record was beaten. I hear Ninja might try for the W on mixer next week. Benton: Damn I gotta catch that stream. Yeah at least the VN battle royale ended up being well written. Honestly now that pewdiepie is at part 83 of his let's play I'm kinda oversaturated with it though. I just wish the game had more content you know, wayyy too basic Robert: I hear the Yogscast is going to do a playthrough of a modpack Ethoslab made for it. "BreedTheBeast", a WereBeast eroge plugin featuring a JIT-compiled Python2.6 scripting interface that allows the user to construct automated breeding factories in the game. For a tier-7 "Nookington's Cradle" breeding setup, the user gets 10E8 slopps (standard love-oriented pylons per second). This should be more than enough to quickly acquire an SMP SERVER (SensualMagnetic Pulse Stdlib::ERoge VERsion 1.39.0 [4560ea788]) that instawins any game. Robert: alright I'm done

Now this is the frame we've been waiting for. *HEAVY BREATHING*

Keeping Noucome’s Fanlation Superior to All Others: A Survey of the Relevant Literature II.5 – Critiquing the Darkrion Sith Lord’s Mining Colonies

Benton: Sleep? They don't have any of those where I'm going. James: And where is that? Benton: Hell. James: They have them there.

I want to replace the air sacs in my lungs with Chocolat's hat.

Stuart little 4 will feature Stuart Little 1 month after returning from his 4 year tour in Bosnia. A cold set of eyes stares into the empty void of George Little's room. "I went to war a mouse, I came back a rat" he whispers under his rancid breath. Margalo has come to see him. Stuart, however, knows the truth. He knows shes been fooling around at ratatouille's kitchen. Stuart knows what he has to do. He loads two bullets into the chamber of his .38 special. Tonight he will die his second death. Splashing down in theatres summer 2020.

Did you hear about the all-girls muslim school in Austin? We called it Hijab High.

Benton: Alright I need to stop reading that and start reading why trannies are people too. James: HA! Good luck with that!

Rust omitted generics and it appeals to the trannies.

Benton: That's not a memcaching server >:( Rick: Yeah its a memecaching server

That's not a memcaching server >:(

MOSHI MOSHIIII! OKAAYYY!

James: Give me money James: Benton Give me _money_ James: Benton give James: Benton me money Benton: I already bought my freedom massa James: Very well, I release you from your bonds

Robert: Oh thank God, I found my prompt. Benton: What? Robert: I thought I lost my philosophy prompt and was going to have to ask the professor to send it to me again. Benton: You're going to write your Hegel paper on Love Live? Robert: OH, if I were doing that— I'D BE DONE BEFORE THE SUN CAME UP. Chika the Hegelian hero.

I would say that the Panda Express is doing more harm than vaping

He’s not an incel, he’s a communist

All i can see now is the E Too pictures where they replaced her face with that markeplier farquad edit You know in the scene where she first contracts the Dino aids

Its like a middle school where everyone is on HRT

They are my new religion. Chili lime peanuts. When I get home I am ordering a shipping container and storing them in a an industrial cabinet. When you crunch into that chili lime peanut for the first time, you will not be able to physically stand.

That’s when you take a pile of breadsticks and smother it in alfredo sauce! That’s a fibonacci heap!

Is type strictness left or right wing?

KIKU IS ALIVE 🦀🦀🦀🦀

Forgot to get my soy vaccine flying from Austin to SFO. I’m done for.

Theres no chipotle near my apartment. Ankit’s gonna go sicko mode.

Welcome to the world of history degrees.

Benton: Asian booty, Ryan like Ryan: Don’t hold that meme against me.

Pretty sure Kerne likes the Dual-end

I want a grass minecraft hut in the background and diamond blocks and a guy hitting a skeleton

Rick: Who is this “Fortran”? Benton: The hacker known as fortran

Socialism is basically when you make a furnace in Minecraft and everyone shares the coal.

There needs to be a computer science aggie ring that’s just like… virtual. Like a fortnite skin or something.

There was one day there’s just like 5 Tracy Hammonds scanning through my paper…

Benton: Does a ring dunk count if its’ with gamer girl pee? 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 Robert: I would say that’s the only time it counts. Probably gonna do mine with Guava juice. Benton: Good point. Koreans be like “Let’s go to ShareTea I gotta do my ring dunk”.

It's as if R is the official language of India. Every single program comes from Dubai— I mean Mumbai— School of Technology.

*rubs hands while grinning* That's gonna be dirty

Just look at ID, definitely a quizlet major

I showed this to some guys at dell— real old guys— and they were like "that's dumb". I was like WHAT?! They all used some dumb shit that makes linux penguins run down your window.

Chimnay and I rolled by a bunch of weirdo libtard art majors playing with marshmellows in street by hrbb. Were both in suits carrying presentation gear and a bunch of blue haired people are laying down in the street😂 He just asked why those high schoolers were playing on campus and I didn't have the heart to tell him.

I give it a solid 5-6. That's the Guess hot take of the week™

Widen the margins.

This is the most postmodern shit I've heard in my life

Ryan: Robert, put on Shelter. Benton. Please don't. There no song I've heard more in my life.

This guy's profile photo is the default twitter egg. All of his albums are moe shop... I'm outta here.

You need to fuck with the user agent to get past these guys

Nanpasu Libtards FORCED INTO RABIT SERVITUDE by CAGE of FACTS and the LOCK of LOGIC by big chungus epic style. At 3AM. With Boss baby.

It's my favorite time of year. Snow halation memes grow exponentially with the coming of Christmas in December

What? You haven’t seen anime student council president Dr. Wang yet?

Honestly this is the shortest time in an anime they went from first word spoken to the word "Student Council President" I've ever seen. I love it.

The irregular at magic high school is a shitshow. I love it. "I cant underestimate her, shes a class 1 upperclasswoman" just fantastic.

What’s more important, your liver or your GPA?

No nintendies switchies

No soy diet No nintendies switchies All meat and linear algebra Sleeps in the office Drinks in the office Watches the highest form of entertainment (anime) Likes Dota Gigachad rating: Inf

Kerne said he hated 25x25 today. Broken clock is right twice a day.